It's just a dream

I see them, over there. It doesn't matter who they are, what are they doing, they can be talking, dancing. I don't see the reality anymore, so who cares about objectivity? It's just a picture, I no longer try to understand them, know them, it's not about them anymore since my mind is not even there, but where is it? I don't know where it goes in those moments, it just flies away, to a better place, a safe one. "Candyland" would be a good name, there's no pain in there, although it's made of it, of the things that hurt, just reconverted, just a completely different thing. Like Alice crossing the mirror, a new world that is upside down is inside me or m I the one inside of it? It's hard to tell when you don't wanna see that it's just a dream, another fantasy.

I may look caged inside of it, unable to wake up and come back to the real world with real problems, real people and what they call "real opportunities". I'm starting to think I don't want them, that it's never enough, is it my fault? Indeed it is, but as long as I don't see it please don't tell me. Don't talk, don't move me, just let me be in there, happy insensibility. But I always wake up. I never want too, it might be good or not, but it's not what I want.

Like it died long ago

One day, two, three, a week, a month, years, a lifetime... It was a no return path, loneliness in the dark, in a place where you can't see where you're going, but you have to go to somewhere. Just keep moving, don't stop, never stop actually or you'll feel it. You don't remember it? It's there, under you, above you, inside you... the creeping feeling that grows, the numbness that leads you of leaving the road and getting lost. With that invisible and pointless objective you are something, with out it you're dead. It will catch you, strangle you, make you suffer your worst nightmares and maybe then it will leave you, lifeless, laying alone once more.

You need to keep moving and stop thinking, because thinking is bad, now you know what I'll do to you, so don't do it. Don't ever question, don't think but above all that, don't feel or it will catch you faster. It's the hidden truth inside of you after all, it hurts, you're hurt, deadly hurt. If you look down you'll see all the blood, if you feel you'll notice the pain, if you think you'll remember when it happen, so just don't.

There's no way out of this, just another step, then another more and so it goes until you can't continue anymore. There's no happy ending for this sadistic game so called life, you were put in it alone, you'll die in it alone and as they say, they rest may be an illusion. But you don't want the pain, the blood of that illusion, do you? I doubt that. Illusions can be cruel as reality, is worse reality just because is real or an illusion just because it doesn't exist? Well, who cares, there's no time for philosophy here. Keep going, another step and forget about everything that will eventually kill you, we know it's easier this way, that's what work was made for, the same goes for all the stuff you use to avoid thinking. Use it, it's there for your survival, just use it and never think, you'll be happy this way.